Wednesday, December 23, 2020

“That’s not how we did it up North”

Nothing “grinds my gears” more than a Yankee thinking things were run better back up north. 

Let’s be honest you wouldn’t have moved to Charlotte if things were better “Up North”.

As long as we’re being honest, most of y’all have never ventured off the interstate because if you did you’d learn a little something:

Gas is cheaper by a fair amount.

There are massive industrial plants in the middle of nowhere in the Carolinas.

Downwind of a chicken farm is not a good thing.

Not all Southerners are blue collar red-necks, most but not all.

That said Red-Neck does not equal racist.

Most, well actually all of us have always treated people of color as equals for 100 years and more. We really don't care what your skin color happens to be. 

The notion of the racist southerner is fiction.

(By the way - going south on 521 to Lancaster and heading towards Camden then highway 601 (she’s straight as an arrow for forty miles) to Charleston it is called the old way. Try it sometime.)


If we’re still being honest here are some things Southerners really hate about Yankees:

Complainers about the humidity (Yes we know it is humid in the summer but how about now? (You don’t need a humidifier in the winter in the south do you?)

People who ask is it always this hot in July - Wait til August or September. 

Picking up after your dog is great – but only a Yankee would put his/her doggie poop bag in someone else’s roll-out garbage can.

Mulch, seriously? In particular brown or even black mulch. We prefer Pine needles, if you’ve been to the Masters at Augusta National you’d understand why we hate Mulch - only a Yankee would use mulch.

Screens on your windows - Why? No one in the South opens their windows but twice a year.

Transplants who bring their snow-blowers south. Nothing says Yankee like one with a snow blower in the south. Particularly one who clears his own driveway of the once a year or decade snow, leaving the neighbor’s driveways to melt in 24 hours.

People who are still proud loyal Giants, Eagles, Steelers, Patriots and the worst Buffalo fans after moving south.

That Green and Yellow “G” plate or heaven forbid a North Carolina or South Carolina state vanity plate that reads NY4LIFE is just gross. Yes, we know the Panthers are pretty bad.

This is the South you are either ACC or SEC - Carolina or Duke (Rhymes with Puke), Clemson or Georgia, Florida or Gators, Auburn or Bama, and if you live in Alabama there are only two choices.

Pepsi - Down here, there is no Pepsi. Everything is Coke. Even Pepsi is called Coke. True Southerners don’t like going North because up there, if you ask for Coke, all y’all get is freaking Pepsi.

Ice-Tea is sweet and it’s not ordered as Sweet Tea, it is just ice - tea. Only lazy Yankees would pour tea over ice cubes and hand you a tray of sugar to make your own and charge you for it.

People who wear toboggans and puffy jackets just because it is November. This is the south. The girls at Carolina (both) wear shorts year around. Sandals and shorts March til November, Uggs and shorts from December til February.

People who are in a hurry to get somewhere yet because they ain’t from around here, have no idea where they are going and that’s why they are in a hurry.

Lack of Manners:

Close talkers and people who stand on top of you in a grocery line. Come on y’all Harris Teeter ain’t a subway car.

Impatient people in a check-out line. I know you just can’t understand why the cashier is sharing photos of her rescue dog or grand children with a complete stranger. Get over it!

People who are disrespectful of wait staff. Speaking of wait staff - If you’ve never had breakfast at waffle house at 2:00 am you haven’t experienced real southern hospitality.

Calling people names - we don’t do that. We don’t talk bad about anyone, the worst we’ll say is “bless her heart” or “that boy ain’t right”.

Now “he needed killing” is kinda extreme and reserved only for people who God hadn’t dealt with efficiently and weren’t raised right.

People who blurt out questions, without a simple hello, good morning or excuse me, before demanding answers, directions or a price.

Doors – we hold doors for everyone and we expect you to do so as well. If you don’t well you weren’t raised right.

Failure to wave - Southerners wave to everyone if you don't wave back you weren't raised right.

People who say "The South Lost Get Over It" -  Actually the South won. We are still winning, that's why Yankees are moving here. Jobs, weather, economy, and we want to keep it that way. 

Merging traffic – I’m not even going there.

32 comments:

Anonymous said...

Cedar is right about waving. I can be on a rural road in South Carolina pass some farm house where someone I have never seen before and will never see again he'll wave and I'll wave back. And it always makes me simile. Yankees just don't get it.

Anonymous said...

The worst part of them moving South is bringing their frickin' politics with them and ruining everything here! You fled NY/NJ/MD/DC/PA et al because of all the government overreach and taxes, but yet you fail to understand your years of liberal voting is what brought that upon you. You can't figure out on your own though, if you continue to vote that way, you will turn your new found utopia into a shithole like the one you fled. Good job Yankees fan!

Anonymous said...

Calling people names?? I call BS on that Cedar. You southerners do it but you talk behind peoples backs. Us Yankees got the balls to say the shit to your face. No one likes a 2-face. You gotta respect that at least. You may not like us but you always know where you stand.

Anonymous said...

Yankees are just rude. Was at Chick-Fil-A in the dual drive through lanes woman in the other lane insisted she was "next" so I let her go ahead this created confusion since my order was placed before her order. So when she gets to the window they don't have her order so she has to drive forward and park. I get my order make the light and have to laugh because she's still parked while they sort out the confusion. Karma is cool like that.

Anonymous said...

Got to love Yankees frankness come for dinner means come for dinner. They are not just being nice. Southerners are just being nice.

Anonymous said...

Until we got a Chief from up north the CFD never had to do mandatory overtime on Christmas. My how things change

Anonymous said...

9:38....People from the South are like that!

Anonymous said...

12:39...We'll let you have some of our CMPD Chiefs? They know as much about fighting fire as they do fighting crime!

Anonymous said...

What about slob-like Sgt. McGarity wearing shorts, t-shirt, and flip-flops to work in B1 while on light duty? If I remember the directives correctly causal business attire should be worn to include a shirt with a collar.I guess when you are an unprofessional slob and don't care about anything, you can pretty much do what you want?

Anonymous said...

Yankees live and die by their NFL Teams most Southerners feel the same way about college football and more so about hoops. The college games are so much better and no idiots are taking knees or trying to make some stupid political statement. Jerry Richardson was a smart man he knew that take a knee racial justice BS was going to kill the NFL found a sucker to buy the Panthers and is laughing all way to the bank.

How many lives has the BLM mural saved? How many bodies are under 18? Black Lives Matter my ass.

Anonymous said...

How many homicides are we up to now?

Anonymous said...

1:02....Tepper is already looking at replacing Bridgewater at quarterback for the Panthers because he wants a Super Bowl win instead of building a winning team! Yep, he's a Yankee!

Not anonymous said...

Yes, indeed the most anticipated annually played match up in SC and Georgia is indeed the Clemson UGA game. In SC, you’re either Clemson or Georgia. In GA, you’re either Georgia or Clemson. That’s just the way it is, and northerners wouldn’t know anything about that. And another thing they wouldn’t know is when Gamecock and Tiger fans meet, and Bulldog and Yellow Jacket fans for that matter, it is nothing but a cordial exchange of pleasantries and a true display of Southern gentility.

Anonymous said...

While we are on the subject of Southern gentility, anything new on the pledge fund?

Anonymous said...

Go Tigers!!!

Anonymous said...

Romo was from DC then he went to Richmond(Yankee)He looks like Curious George with those ears. And yes we are looking at 120 Homicides. We may past the record and my snitch says it was the Russians that hacked into the Police Pledge fund.

Anonymous said...

With the stupid reasons cmpd canned officers over the years why would anyone be dumb enough to put money into a pledge fund? Think about it.. how many officers actually do a full 30 years here? They’ll either resign, get fired, go federal or go private sector. A select few spend their entire career here. Also currently we’re down over 500 officers, homicides are at all time high and uptown looks like a zombie apocalypse of homelessness. You wanna compare southerners to Yankees? How bout not letting Charlotte turn into another Detroit or San Francisco, let’s start there

Anonymous said...

It getting awful dark here!

Anonymous said...

City and county leaders, including CMPD, have the ability to deal with these homeless camps and what not but they choose to feel sorry for them instead. There is no feeling sorry for someone who only wants money to buy dope and alcohol!

Anonymous said...

We need more social workers and violence interrupters!

Anonymous said...

How many "Homey"-cides are there now?

Anonymous said...

5am

I completely agree with you. Uptown is a fucking ghost town. Charlotte is occupied by the enemy and their citizens don't even realize it.


I think we will break the record. We need 3 more in one week..

Anonymous said...

I hope the idiots on city council and our idiot Mayor read these posts. Do you see where NY, San Fran and LA have become? They are loosing their tax base. Keep it up and Charlotte will be the same.

Anonymous said...

Two more shot and killed...We're fittin' to break the record!

Anonymous said...

Down we go!

Russ said...

I'm a transplant from MD and have fully embraced the local culture, just as I did in Columbia SC when I went to USC. Nothing shows a lack of self-awareness like transplants that constantly talk about how much better things are where they came from. I wholeheartedly believe they should go back. Also, don't bring your failing liberal policies to NC!!!! It's a joke.

Anonymous said...

Maryland is considered a southern state.

Common Sense said...

dead

Anonymous said...

Dead? What about the pledge fund?

Anonymous said...

^^^This guy....

Maryland is trash just like South Carolina once you go beyond Fort Mill. Will we get the record for murders or not?

Anonymous said...

Spoken like true Liberal!

Anonymous said...

Speaking of Braxton Winston, he needs to change his first name because "Braxton" is the name of Confederate General Braxton Bragg.